{"id":22,"date":"2013-08-19T06:08:27","date_gmt":"2013-08-19T06:08:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/?p=22"},"modified":"2014-01-22T11:06:07","modified_gmt":"2014-01-22T11:06:07","slug":"healing-am-i-a-cancer-survivor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/healing-am-i-a-cancer-survivor\/","title":{"rendered":"Healing: Am I a Cancer Survivor?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"SUMMERPOND\"<\/a><\/span>A<\/span>m I a cancer survivor?<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 I\u2019d written only that one line when I was suddenly attacked by a wave of pain and nausea. Barely able to walk, I hobbled to the bathroom holding my middle, catching a glimpse of my pale grey reflection in a mirror on the way.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Heart attack? Gas? Cancer? My mind raced to locate the pain that moved from front to back and from low to high, all over me. I thought of the beer and two and <\/span>a half hotdogs I ate at the hikers\u2019 picnic a few hours before. A<\/span>nd then, for a half hour, I sat on the toilet with a wastebasket in my lap and remembered my daughter during her chemo treatments, moaning on the bathroom floor, hugging the toilet.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 As I waited to feel better, I recalled the cycles of remission and relapse, and how everything in our lives was put on hold <\/span>as we waited for the pains to subside and for her good days to<\/span> outnumber the bad.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Following my daughter in and out of hospitals, I lived with cancer for almost three years. It was a life-changing experience. Marika got completely washed out by it. But I survived. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 As a result of cancer I run to show the dermatologist every new freckle that appears. I put off my annual physical exams. I give blood whenever I can. I drag my feet in<\/span> finding jobs and can\u2019t seem to return to my normal daily life. I feel compelled to volunteer and donate to cancer-related organizations. And I want to hug and hold every chemo warrior and her mother. Like <\/span>Erica Zimmer the Awkward Cancer Girl<\/a>. And <\/span>Robin Roberts<\/a> of Good Morning America. And <\/span>Suleika Jaouad<\/a> with Life, Interrupted.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 But mostly, I watch the world like it has put on new jewels and makeup. The sweetness and fragility of life awes me each morning and every night and all the blessed moments in between.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Am I a cancer survivor?             I’d written only that one line when I was suddenly attacked by a wave of pain and nausea. Barely able to walk, I hobbled to the bathroom holding my middle, catching a glimpse of my pale grey reflection in a mirror on the way. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-25"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}