{"id":537,"date":"2014-06-09T08:04:23","date_gmt":"2014-06-09T12:04:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/?p=537"},"modified":"2014-06-16T10:18:02","modified_gmt":"2014-06-16T14:18:02","slug":"part-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/part-life\/","title":{"rendered":"The Last Part of Life"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Father\u201cThank you, Dad,\u201d I say to my father almost every day.<\/p>\n

In September 2009, my sisters and I flew to our father in Florida. In the Delray Beach Hospital\u2019s Intensive Care Unit, we watched him sleep, hooked to machines and monitors, sensor pads pasted all over. His glasses, dentures, and hearing aids lay on the bedside table. He was beyond fixing.
\nHe woke up annoyed, tossing his head from side to side, No.
\nIt was not supposed to be like this. He had not intended to get stuck in an artificial extension of his life. He had planned and prepaid for his trip out of the world.<\/em> The bills had been paid and a large loose-leaf binder was filled with his living will, advance directives, insurance information, and paperwork on everything he owned including a prepaid cremation. For months, maybe years, he had designed and documented his smooth exit like he was leaving on a long vacation.
\n\u201cIt\u2019s time,\u201d he said from his hollow mouth, not blinking. He wanted out.<\/p>\n

How did he come to welcome his death with outstretched arms, I wondered? Could I ever design my own dying<\/a> as if it were a shining adventure? If I watched a hundred people die might I lose my fear<\/a> and see death for what it really is \u2013 the last part of life \u2013 and wrap it up royally?<\/p>\n

I need to understand this thing that separates me from my father and my daughter. To gain a closer connection to death I attend Death Cafes<\/a>, grief film series, and trainings at my local Hospice center. I photograph things that have died, determined to appreciate death\u2019s beauty.<\/p>\n

In September 2009, the nurses at the Florida hospital\u2019s Hospice Unit wheeled my father into the family room unconscious and finally freed from all the life-supporting paraphernalia. He lasted long enough for me to say, \u201cThank you, Dad.\u201d I wanted the last words he heard to be \u201cthank you\u201d although I didn\u2019t know where he\u2019d be taking those words. As I watched him take his last breath, I made a promise to be my father\u2019s daughter for the rest of my time.
\nFive years later, in his honor, I have started to fill my own loose-leaf binder.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Thank you, Dad,” I say to my father almost every day. In September 2009, my sisters and I flew to our father in Florida. In the Delray Beach Hospital’s Intensive Care Unit, we watched him sleep, hooked to machines and monitors, sensor pads pasted all over. His glasses, dentures, and hearing aids lay on the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[159,157,162,161,163,158,156,167,160],"class_list":["post-537","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-1","tag-advance-directive","tag-death-cafe","tag-fear-of-dying","tag-preparing-to-die","tag-thank-you-dad","tag-the-beauty-of-death","tag-the-last-of-life","tag-the-last-part-of-life","tag-welcoming-death"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t