![\"A](\"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/06\/ElderPearl-768x1024.jpg\")
We are ALL dying. This is what I tell myself, driving to the hospice center to train to be a morning-shift kitchen volunteer. Even with weeks of hospice training, I\u2019m still nervous about interacting with people who are dying. I don\u2019t want them to see behind my eyes, the hidden thought: you might not be here when I return next week. So I keep telling myself we\u2019re All leaving town sooner or later \u2013 some of us just have an earlier flight.<\/p>\n
Shadowing the Thursday-morning volunteer, I operate the sanitizing dishwasher and the coffee machine. She shows me where to find spatulas, and introduces me to the staff and the routine. Then she has me make an egg, my first egg for someone who is not in my immediate family.
\n\u201cI\u2019m not much of a cook,\u201d I apologize before I\u2019ve even cracked the shell. This might be someone\u2019s last egg so I want it to be good.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019re all leaving town, we\u2019re all leaving town,\u201d I say to myself as I follow Thursday-Morning into a darkened room and place the tray with the egg and a tippy-cup of milk before a pale man in a hospital bed. I follow as we peek into rooms to offer breakfast.
\nWhen we return to the kitchen, a tall man in boxer shorts is rummaging about. He does not look like he\u2019s dying. He looks like he\u2019s hungry.
\n\u201cAre you finding what you need?\u201d Thursday-Morning asks. The man walks out with a big bowl of chocolate ice cream.
\n\u201cThat\u2019s my kind of breakfast,\u201d I say to him. But he is focused on his dish.<\/p>\n
A white-haired woman sits at the dining room table waiting for her eggs. I bring her coffee on a tray hoping she won\u2019t get impatient as I scramble around to help Thursday-Morning make a perfect egg and piece of toast. The woman is very polite to me. She\u2019s not scary at all. And she\u2019s in no hurry.<\/p>\n
When the morning shift is over I drag my feet saying goodbye. I find myself smiling, looking forward to the next time.
\nThen, in my car heading home, I have a flashback of long ago breakfast trays with bright cloth napkins, jolly eggs and toast, and smoothies. To\u00a0 coax my daughter out of bed for high school, and later for morning drives to the hospital, I\u2019d bring her breakfast-in-bed trays.
\n\u201cMom, you make the worst pancakes,\u201d she used to say.<\/p>\n
I cry when I remember. Marika, do you believe this? Look where I am. I’m gonna make breakfast trays for all these people now.<\/em> We are ALL dying. This is what I tell myself, driving to the hospice center to train to be a morning-shift kitchen volunteer. Even with weeks of hospice training, I’m still nervous about interacting with people who are dying. I don’t want them to see behind my eyes, the hidden thought: you might not be […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[164,166,165],"class_list":["post-541","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-1","tag-hospice-volunteer","tag-ice-cream-for-breakfast","tag-we-are-all-dying"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/541","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=541"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/541\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=541"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=541"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robinbotie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=541"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nBut I quickly wipe my tears. There’s something else to worry about now: when I do my kitchen shift, what if they ask me to make pancakes?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"